The Cub Your Mother Warned You About (jrcubindy) wrote,
The Cub Your Mother Warned You About

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Saw Jason today...for a bit, anyhoo.

He and Eric were feenin to play Shadowrun today, so we all went over Dave's. Truth to tell, I couldn't have cared too much less about Shadowrun. My mind is on two games at the present: Palladium and In Nomine. I just wanted to see him again, as his parents are once again asserting control over him and Eric by dragging them to St Louis for the next two weekends. And lets face it, that's all that's about.


Eric is maybe going to get lucky and go to Ball State for college. If he does, I know he's going to go buck wild and more than likely flunk out. That joint has a rep as a party college and Eric doesn't exactly have the world's greatest work ethic. But until then, he'll be more or less out of their reach for the most part.

That leaves Jason alone with mom. *sigh* I am praying he gets this job so he can pay off that blasted car note and move in with me and Nate. I so want him out of there, but he won't defy her too much until he feels halfway financially secure. I can kinda understand that, but in the meantime, sometimes it feels like her and his father are trying to separate him from us as much as they can. While asking him to be home by 2AM and doing various chores is reasonable, as he is still living in her house, dragging him to St Louis to attend a wedding for people he doesn't even know is not. For God's sake, he's 22! If he doesn't wanna go, he shouldn't have to! Shit like that and the way they treated him this past weekend makes me hate them, I swear to God. bigboychb says I should channel that into love and support for him. I'm doing my best.

The first thing I look at when I see him is his face, naturally... As for the second...

No, not that! Perverts! ^_-

His ankle.

Why, you may ask? Well, that story goes back to TBRU.

Everytime I go somewhere, I try to bring him back something. (Well, except the time I went to Chicago, but I didn't hit the vendor fairs at either BP or IML.)

Anyway, in Texas, I hit the vendor fair and bought him a beanie baby bear that was striped the colors of the bear flag, a trance CD mixed by a bear DJ from Fort Wayne, I believe (I'm wasn't completely sure if he'd like it, but it had DJ Tiesto, so I figured he'd listen to it at least) and at a booth run by this lesbian couple, I had an beaded anklet with the bear flag colors made for him. I wasn't entirely sure of his size and it took them a bit to make it, but it looked nice.

When I got back and got him alone in my apartment, I gave him the bear and the CD, then got down on one knee and put the anklet on him myself. It's a good fit, if a little loose, but it didn't need adjusting at all. He's worn it almost every time I've seen him since.

That anklet is as symbolic to me as a ring would be. I smile everytime I see it on his ankle now. All of my doubts and more than a few of my fears are dispelled the instant I see it. It's become a very reassuring thing. No matter what his face may or may not show or what he may or may not be able to say, that's his way of telling me he's thinking of me.

I'll be waiting, Jason...
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